Amigos' NBA Previews- Boston Celtics

Recent Past: They traded for a couple of guys you may have heard of, they did a thing you may have heard about, and then they tried to do that thing again but one of those guys you may have heard of was hurt. And that made it more difficult. They lost to the Magic in 7, getting beaten at home as they were knocked out of the playoffs. And now, they look for...I don't know some sort of redemption, which will surely include lots of screaming and ubuntu.

Offseason: They added Sheed, Marquis Daniels, and Candace Parker's husband, while losing Leon Powe, Steph, Patrick O'Bryant, and Mikki Moore. Adding Sheed while losing Powe is a move that's probably not as good as most would assume, with Powe's great per minute stats, but it should work out if Sheed plays like he can. Daniels is a back up guard with a lot of potential, but we have no idea if he'll ever live up to that potential.

Probable Lineup: Rajon Rondo, Ray Allen, Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett, Kendrick Perkins; Eddie House, Marquis Daniels, Rasheed Wallace, Glen Davis,Shelden Wallace, and Brian Scalabrine's hair as key subs.

General Outlook: Look, the Celtics are really fucking good. We know this. There are really only three questions here. 1) Will they stay healthy? 2) Will Ray and/or KG fall off? 3) How much will Sheed help? I guess a fourth could be "will Rondo be as awesome as he was in the playoffs", but that sort of would necessitate that he'd play as big a role as he did without KG. And that doesn't seem likely. Kendrick Perkins also stepped up in the playoffs/at the end of last season, and so now we're looking at a team with three stars and two potentially great role players. Oh, and Rasheed fucking Wallace on the bench, along with a few other guys that give them pretty nice depth. Yea, so basically? Boston are not allowed to play that underdog shit this year. It is not acceptable.

You look at this team, and immediately, because of the state of the league, you compare them to the other four/five contenders. And you know what? I like them against any of those teams, except maybe LA. And that seems to be just about a toss up. So, even though Orlando's looking really good, and Cleveland's still got LeBron motherfucking James (and Shaq...and people), and the Spurs had a really nice offseason...I'm looking to the Celtics as the Lakers main rival this year. Now, I don't know about this 72 wins shit, but they ought to win...well, a fucking lot. And I'd be a bit surprised if they don't make it to the finals, honestly.

If they were a hip hop act: Kanye West. Like Kanye in the "College Dropout" era, they were a pretty sympathetic bunch when they toppled the evil Lakers, with everyone sort of wanting KG to get his ring. But now they're just sort of assholes playing in fucking Boston, and are pretty universally hated. As the Celtics should be, really.

Guessing how they'll do: Finish with the NBA's best record, lose in finals. Maybe. No matter what, there will be LOTS AND LOTS OF SCREAMING AND INTENSITY.