Amigos' NBA Previews: Golden State Warriors

First off, I want to note that this was intentional, and that I do actually recognize that 'G' comes before 'H' in the alphabet. I simply did not have enough time earlier to devote to writing about the Warriors. Because this is something that will take a while, whereas I wrote about 12 words on the Rockets. ACUS FUCK THE ROCKETS. Yea, I said it.

Anyway.


Recent Past Lots and lots of weirdness. After a decade+ of mostly sucking, you know, a lot, the eight seeded Warriors managed to beat the Mavs in the first round in '07, drawing universal acclaim and lots of Baron-love. Since then, it's been pretty fucking disappointing. Lots of general dysfunction, off an on the court, has led to results beneath what was expected of the young team post-emergence.

Offseason (yes, I realize that's a Knicks jersey)

The Warriors gave up Crawford because Nelson decided he didn't want to play him anymore, getting back Speedy Claxton and Acie Law. So, basically, a bit of cap relief after this season. They also added Devean George and Mikki Moore, as well as drafting Stephen Curry at seven in the draft. So, basically, they added Curry and...stuff.

Probable lineup: Ha. You know who coaches this team, right?

But I'll take a crack at it. Monta Ellis, Anthony Morrow, Stephen Jackson, Anthony Randolph, and Andris Biedrins as starters. C.J. Watson, Stephen Curry, Kelenna Azubuike, Corey Maggette, Brandon Wright, and Ronny Turiaf as key subs. Or, you know, not.

General Overview AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(deep breath)

Okay, I think I'm ready now. Look back up at that lineup. How much fucking quality depth does this team have? I didn't even bother with any of the four players they brought in (from outside the draft), and there's 11 guys that could all get solid minutes for a pretty decent number of teams. And yet, almost nobody has the Warriors as a playoff team. Et pourquoi?

Well. There's the whole "dysfunctional mess run by a somewhat insane Don Nelson" thing. That's a start. And as a result of...that, you have to almost check your positivity at the door with this team. Which is a shame, because there's so damn much to be positive about.

At point, you instantly recognize that, alright...there sort of isn't a point guard. Not one that's likely to get a bunch of minutes, anyway. Ellis is a scorer; he can drive to the hoop and sometimes decides to pass it, but that's not exactly on some John Stockton shit. Watson will get time, sure, but even he's not a particularly traditional '1'. You figure that it will probably be a pretty heavy, weird rotation at the guard spots, featuring a lot of Ellis, and then less of Curry, Morrow, Azubuike, Jackson, Watson, and perhaps others playing at various spots (in some cases, all the way up to the '4'). And so they'll be spending a lot of time without a real point, or even a point-forward, and in those cases it will be really important that they're able to either a) get out and run, or b) get into positive match ups in order to go 1 on 1. Failing this, we'll see a lot of disorder, the same kind of shit that enraged those of us who made GSW a staple of our NBA-watching last season.

The positive thing about all that versatility, with only a couple players really fixed to one spot on the court, is that the Warriors can at times be a matchup nightmare for opponents. The negative aspect of it is...opponents can quite regularly be matchup nightmares for the Warriors. Their defensive woes aren't exactly a secret, and though they have a few guys that can excel on the defensive end individually, it's tended to be a bit of a mess on the whole. Of course, part of that mess has been because of a lack of effort on the defensive end, which is one of the other things that can annoy the shit out of you when watching this team.

But, anyway. We sort of already mentioned all the options at the '2', but let's sort of expound upon that. I'm figuring it will be the most random of all the spots on this extremely random team, but I think Morrow will end up getting a pretty decent amount of time there, and as a result I put him down as a possible starter. Morrow's the most normal player on this team, and I'm not sure if that'll be looked at as a good thing by Nelson, but it's...a thing. He's a very good three point shooter, which is certainly something Nelson will like, but other than that he doesn't bring all that to the table. But I think his (relative) stability would be a positive influence on this team, especially when you look at the other names in that possible starting five. I mean, it's pretty fucking weird when you're left in a position where a somewhat streaky three point ace is seen as a stabilizing force,but there you go. Just to add some idea of the potential weirdness to this paragraph, we'll probably see a lot of Monta-Curry, Monta-Jack, Monta-Buike, Curry-Jack, and Curry-Buike combos in the backcourt this year. So, yea.

At what we'll loosely refer to as the small forward spot, Jackson seemed to be the only sure thing in the lineup last season. But with his recent outburst(s), and his ability to raise hell, that adds yet another dimension of "what the fuck" to this extremely "what the fuck" worthy franchise. I'd imagine no-longer Captain Jack will probably still see the vast majority of the time at this spot, but who knows if he'll still be around for very long. I'm not sure there's a ton of trade possibilities, but who knows. Looking at other guys that can play here, I really like Kelenna, and I'm not sure how much time he'll see caught up in this whole...thing. They still have Maggette, which I've forgotten on numerous occasions. He's got a big contract that he probably doesn't live up to, but the dude can get to the line like a motherfucker. And that's still a pretty valuable skill.

At the '4', you have possibly the most interesting player in the whole league. Alright, perhaps an overstatement, but come on! It's Anthony Randolph. He...cries, he looks like he's crying, he makes you cry, and yet he's still pretty awesome. A 6'11 athletic freak somewhere between Durant and Garnett, he's now somewhat universally tipped to become a star after putting up some damn solid stats as a still somewhat raw 19 year old. There were problems with his playing time last season, but I'm pretty sure even Don Nelson won't fuck around with this dude in the upcoming season. He can handle the ball, he can shoot a bit, he can rebound like nobody's business, and he can swat shots. So, like I said, somewhere between Garnett and Durant. When Randolph's not in the game, Brandon Wright's another very promising young forward when healthy, and also look for Nelson to do a lot of weird shit with moving guys that definitely aren't '4's to this spot.

Alright, moving onto the five, it's definitely Biedrins, when he's healthy. He's a very efficient scorer who knows his range, and he can run the court a bit. For me, he's just about a perfect fit for this team, which made the whispers of his possible departure really fucking annoying. Hopefully he can stick around and stay healthy, because he can grab the boards and put the ball in the hoop. He's not a really imposing presence, but it's the fucking Warriors, and they aren't particularly expecting anyone to be an imposing presence. Off the bench, Turiaf's a nice (if overpaid) backup center who definitely brings the energy, and is really just hard to criticize too much. And, once again, Nelson will probably occasionally pull some weird shit here.

Basically, to wrap this up? Expect the unexpected, and a whole lot of weird shit, from this GSW squad. And, of course, their coach. Especially the coach.

If they were a hip hop act Because you have to treat your feelings towards both Dig Planets and the Warriors with a bit of irony. I'm going to take absurdly entertaining, up and down, "dumb" basketball to be the equivalent of sort of silly philosophical references and a sort of half-assed attempt at seeming uber-Marxist. Anyway, the point is, despite their (glaring) faults, I sort of really dig both.

Guessing how they'll do In case you haven't figured out yet, I think this is sort of almost impossible. But, I'll go ahead and say that the Warriors will do something resembling putting it all together, making a real run at a playoff spot. Unfortunately, I sort of think they'll fall just short.